… ‘cause no one enjoys a sour puss!

Have you ever encountered those poor souls who always seem miserable and glide through life with a perpetual scowl frozen in place? Life is hard and boy do their wretched and sourful expressions never neglect to reflect it! One can leave the house adorned in the finest clothes or most elaborate jewelry, but nothing conceals an exhaustive tarty expression. A warm smile is actually the most precious accessory we can add to our personal wardrobe each morning.

Your smile is a reflection of goodwill towards others

Yesterday I was feeling fatigued at work and was also scheduled to administer a test to some college students. Since I was feeling pretty crappy, I tried to alleviate my spirits a bit by humming softly underneath my breath. Suddenly a student burst into the room on crutches with his arm in a sling. As I rushed over to help him become situated, he cheerfully laughed and recounted his clumsy dirt bike accident last weekend with surprising felicity. Dazzled by his good humor, I couldn’t help but laugh and smile back.

Suddenly I didn’t have to force anything at all; I really did feel more joyful.

One evening I was at a party with a close friend of mine. As she excused herself to use the bathroom, I was awkwardly left standing alone in a room filled with strangers. ‘Now Jennifer,’ I said to myself, ‘it doesn’t help to stand here with a frightened scowl on my puss. I’m going to try smiling and see what happens.’ I decided to relax and put on a warm smile to mask how silly I felt. Within moments, several people approached to introduce themselves or engage in conversation. The reaction was immediate.

Try it next time you’re out; it really works! A genuine smile makes us appear more approachable and others become naturally drawn toward us.

Consider these very inspirational sage words from Elbert Hubbard;

Whenever you go out of doors, draw the chin in, carry the crown of the head high, and fill the lungs to the utmost; drink in the sunshine; greet your friends with a smile, and put soul into every handclasp.

Do not fear being misunderstood and do not waste a minute thinking about your enemies. Try to fix firmly in your mind what you would like to do; and then without veering of direction, you will move straight to the goal. Keep your mind on the great and splendid things you would like to do, and then, as the days go gliding by, you will find yourself unconsciously seizing upon the opportunities that are required for the fulfillment of your desire, just as the coral insect takes from the running tide the element it needs.

Picture in your mind the able, earnest, useful person you desire to be, and the thought you hold is hourly transforming you into the particular individual……Thought is supreme. Preserve a right mental attitude – the attitude of courage, frankness, and good cheer. To think right is to create. All things come through desire and every sincere prayer is answered.

We become like that on which our hearts are fixed. Draw the chin in, carry the crown of the head high. We are god in the chrysalis.

Other reasons to get your happy groovin’ on

1. A smile boosts and enhances our mood. If you find yourself trapped in a case of the ickies, try humming, whistling or singing softly to yourself for a few moments. You may be surprised how much better you feel.
2. Smiling is contagious and makes us appear more approachable and attractive to others. People crave happiness and are naturally drawn to any type of positive energy we project.
3. Showing off a beautiful smile is also great for your health! Studies have shown that smiling helps lower blood pressure, relieves stress and naturally boosts the immune system by releasing serotonin and endorphins throughout the body. Smiling and laugher are simple and effective methods to increase longevity.

~†~ Baby Steps Are Key  ~†~ Happiness depends on inner conditions, so get your inner sparkle on and smile with plenty of soul! To others, your smile is like the sun bursting through dark clouds and enriches everyone who receives it. And the best part – it’s absolutely free to give.

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Sayings of the Wise

Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be. -Abraham Lincoln

A man without a smiling face must not open up shop. – ancient Chinese proverb

Health must be earned. Get it, you Lobster! -Elbert Hubbard

=^..^=

 † †

Featured Resources

Compare prices and read helpful product reviews to make smart buying easy through Ciao! – Price Comparison and Product Reviews for the savvy shopper.

Developing a More Conscious Lifestyle

During the chaotic nature of life, it’s easy to become distracted and engulfed in day-to-day affairs. Every once in a while I feel a need to suspend all the buzz swirling around me and find a private sanctuary to curl up in for quiet contemplation.

Finances may feel important, but over obsessing about money is unbalanced and certainly not healthy. Whenever I feel overwhelmed in general, the following guidelines serve as gentle reminders which help bring things into greater perspective for me.

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• Don’t only do what is convenient. Learn how to make a deeper commitment and take a more radical responsibility for yourself. Build integrity by exercising the values and ethics which are important to you.

• Recognize the Divine in others through practicing respect and love. Although everyone has their own needs, each are different but equal.

• During conflict, don’t be limited only to your needs. Step outside yourself to consider the needs of others in a more compassionate manner. This helps manifest a positive solution for all concerned.

• Eliminate manipulation through demands, threats and passive-aggressive behavior. Only take from others what they are willing to give freely, and accept others for who they are.

• Let go of Ego and practice simply being in each moment. Rather than trying to exert control over circumstances, learn instead how to become present.

• Healing begins from within. Treat your body well through exercise and a well-balanced diet rich in grains, fruits and vegetables. Drink plenty of water each day, the rich honey of life.

• Volunteer your time. Use your creativity and energy to motivate and help causes which are important to you.

• Recognize that everything has a limit; the day, the night, even one’s own energy and time. No matter how great one’s perceived wealth, there always exists an extent to which one may enjoy it. Feel grateful for and humbled by your current unique blessings.

• Ever catch yourself saying, “I just don’t have time” or “I wish I had time to”? Take responsibility by recognizing that everyone has the same amount of time in each day and ultimately you decide how that time is used. Choose productively and wisely how you wish to dedicate each precious moment.

• Incorporate a quiet meditative practice into your daily routine. Prolonged meditation sharpens focus and enables you to think well, while awakening new levels of the Divine Self. Recent empirical studies are now recognizing how continued meditation physically enlarges and alters our brain.

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Recommended Reading:

The Harvard Gazette, Meditation Found to Increase Brain Size

The Washington Post, Meditation Gives Brain A Charge

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• Take the time to properly honor all the small steps leading up to where you want to be. Don’t miss the beauty of the journey, as each step is equally fulfilling and significant.

• Experience temporary sensory deprivation. Try fasting, taking an hour long vow of silence, or wearing a blindfold or earplugs for an extended period of time. This will enhance awareness of both body and breath, bring perspective and allow you to develop a deeper appreciation for each sensory organ.

• Change is inevitable and everything is constantly influx. Use this wisdom to react less to personal inner dramas and focus more on acceptance and being present.

• Instead of dismissing or burying negative emotion, become aware of fear, worry and discomfort to fully observe and experience it. This helps bring perspective and heightened awareness as you begin to understand the root causes of these emotions.

• Obtaining financial peace of mind means allowing your wealth to absorb unexpected expenses. Obsessing and fretting over financial situations which do not directly affect day-to-day situations sabotages this entire concept. As Marshall Glickman states in his book The Mindful Money Guide, “Getting into a tizzy about a small misfortune undermines the whole point of having any fortune [at all].”

• Take action. Don’t feel discouraged if progress feels slow. Just as a toddler learns how to walk one step at a time, it’s taking that baby step which is most crucial.

~†~ Baby Steps Are Key ~†~ Explore your unique purpose in life and discover what fills your heart with joy. There is never a better time to live fully and with integrity than right now.

~¤~¤~

Sayings of the Wise

Drip by drip, a cup gets filled. -Unknown

“Begin doing what you want to do now. We are not living in eternity. We have only this moment, sparkling like a star in our hand – and melting like a snowflake…”
(Francis Bacon, 1561 – 1626)

“The most effective way to do it, is to do it.” -Amelia Earhart

The Master once offered a banana to an awestruck visitor who so venerated the gift that he hardly knew what to do with it. When the Master was told of this, he said characteristically, “Tell the silly ass to eat it.”

-Awakening, Conversations with the Masters by Anthony de Mello

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Featured Resources 

Compare prices and read helpful product reviews to make smart buying easy through Ciao! – Price Comparison and Product Reviews for the savvy shopper.

Millionaire Mommy Next Door poses an excellent question of Can Money Make You Happy? on her personal blog today. Here is my response to her.

Hi Mommy Millionaire!

There can be a deep correlation between happiness and money. Money has the potential to make us happy through the freedom it provides. It can extend our impact on a grander scale through providing both necessary leisure and adequate resources at our disposal.

There are also many abstract ideals money can’t buy (love, spirituality and contentment, for example)

It’s certainly an interesting topic. Being from a lower middle class family, my lack of income has helped me appreciate money more intensely. And I can see myself still finding happiness here, even now at rock bottom.

If I can find peace and contentment with so little, the more I gain through wise decisions and planning will add another zestful layer into my meager life.

In conclusion, is it easier to find happiness with money? Absolutely! Is money absolutely necessary for happiness?

No, I believe it truly isn’t.

Be sure to nip over to Millionaire Mommy to offer your opinion.

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Obtaining Happiness Through Freedom

In contemporary consumerist society, it’s far too easy to unknowingly become swept up and become a slave chained to persistent debt. Freedom unexpectedly becomes squashed when we’re continually forced to stack personal desires on the back burner in order to pay the incoming bills for next month. And for many Americans, those bills containing their debt can feel excruciatingly overwhelming.

So where have so many gone wrong? Is the problem with society or with ourselves? More importantly, where has our personal happiness vanished to?

Accepting Responsibility Through Conscious Spending

It’s crucial for each of us to approach this question with an honest assessment of our personal financial spending. Perhaps asking yourself some of the following questions might help.

Can you really afford the lifestyle you’re trying (or struggling) to maintain? How many of your daily purchases are completely necessary? To what depth and enjoyment does each purchase amplify your life, to enhance and help you grow as an individual? Will your purchases appreciate over time – or depreciate?

Are you, in fact, spending as consciously as you should be?

Learning Contentment for What You Have

The biggest danger with accumulating items (what I also lovingly refer to as ‘stuff’) is that often, it doesn’t end after one purchase. When we become ensnared to a consumerist mode of thought, it helps perpetuate a vicious cycle of never feeling adequately satiated (aka, the ‘never having enough’ syndrome).

Where is the line drawn of what’s in fact enough ‘stuff’ to keep us happy?

Finding Balance With What You Enjoy While Avoiding Debt

Individuals who comfortably afford luxuries by paying cash and avoid making purchases with future earnings, are situated on one end of the spectrum. May we all be so lucky and wise to be in a similar situation one day, with a surplus of wealth!

However, those remaining individuals who choose to hand their freedom over to debt in order to maintain a standard of living well above their means are in a critical bind. They are selling their freedom to rent a lifestyle they simply can’t afford, and it’s a heavy price to pay.

Is accumulating all this ‘stuff’ worth enslaving yourself to debt? Does your debt justify giving up personal freedom for? Ultimately, will you be happy?

~†~ Baby Steps Are Key ~†~ Eradicate unnecessary clutter and stop further debt to help bring peace of mind – as well as your own slice of freedom and contentment

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Here are some intriguing articles I’ve been reading:

Ramit Sethi at I Will Teach You To Be Rich encourages his readers to sound off their own stories – and many of their experiences on debt are shocking.

Greg Rodgers re-evaluates his own happiness as he plots an escape from cubicle hell, in The Journey Begins With A Single Step (an account that resonated so strongly within, it actually moved me to tears)

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Featured Resources

Compare prices and read helpful product reviews to make smart buying easy through Ciao! – Price Comparison and Product Reviews for the savvy shopper.

Believe it or not, your blossoming network is sitting right under your nose.

In my last article, I reiterated the importance of enriching your life through networking and giving. But how does one go about assembling and sustaining a kick ass network?

The opportunity for meeting new people literally surrounds us every day. First and foremost, we need to be receptive to each new encounter. And then comes the essential part (the part actually where most people fail) – actually keeping in touch with all our new acquaintances.

Obviously the more people you know, the greater the chances of unearthing that exact person you’ll need for your latest fabulous project.

How To Build A Fulfilling, Kick Ass Network

Take a moment to consider some of the tips below on how to launch (and keep) a thriving, kick ass network.

• Discover Interconnection. Have you ever heard the theory of “Six Degrees of Separation”, or small world phenomenon? This focuses on how everyone in the world is separated by merely six people from everyone else. Through establishing successful connections, you can theoretically reach just about anyone in the world!

And in the current technological age, the internet is keeping us more connected than ever before. Use every avenue to your advantage, including email, message boards, and even blogging. The opportunities for meeting exciting new faces are limitless and expanding every day.

• Establish and Keep Track of Your Network. This is extremely important. To launch a successful network, you first need to recognize who is actually included in it. A network is useless if you can’t identify who you’d like to incorporate.

If you feel lost on where to begin, family and friends are excellent starting points. Even college professors are great resources. Need some advice? Thumb through your current contact list. Umm, ok, so your list is currently comprised of yourself, your cat, and your mom? Well it’s still a great place to launch a blossoming network. Try asking dear Mom for a referral to someone else. And remember to give your kitty a special snuggle. (After all, she’s the only one who can stand putting up with you constantly.)

Chances are good if your immediate contacts can’t help out, they will probably know someone who can. When you’re in a bind, take a moment to consider everyone you know.

From now on, every time you meet someone new, make a conscious effort to ask for their name and contact information. Develop an organized plan on how to record each new encounter, including when and how you met and other relevant details. Formulate a type of database and focus on methods to continue expanding on it.

Jot down personal contact details, such as where they live. Are they married with kids? What type of career field are they involved with? What challenges do they face? In other words, what are their specific needs? And what value can you offer to help them become more successful?

• Sustain Your Network By Keeping In Touch. Steal a moment out of your busy schedule to do a small gesture every few weeks, such as sending a brief email to catch up on how they’re doing. Take special notice of any new situations or relevant needs which may have cropped up on their side since you last spoke.
• Help Those in Your Network Connect to Each Other Through You. If you generously give to others and help them become connected, they will be thankful and happy to return the favor down the road when you’re in need.

Perhaps you know someone who has the skills or resources to aid someone else on your contact list. By all means, go ahead and introduce them. Remain receptive to current needs and help out whenever possible.

• Continually Expand and Nurture Your Network. Each encounter in our lives is symbolically profound. Everyone has something unique to teach (whether we realize it or not) and can offer certain value into our lives. Open yourself up to exciting new possibilities and you’ll never know who you might unexpectedly meet.

Consider the sheer amount of people you encounter each day. Remember the guy standing next to you in the elevator?  Or your colleague in the next office? How about the owner of your favorite store, or the gal that was sitting next to you on the bus this morning? Successful people recognize how critical it is to reach out – anyone can be an invaluable resource. 

• Learn How to Ask for Help. If done honestly, there is never any shame in reaching out to others for assistance.

Many competent people are reluctant to do the smart thing by asking for help because they allow their pride or fear to hold them back. So stop sabotaging yourself all ready. Learn how to let others know when you need them. This really can’t be stressed enough.  Never feel afraid or ashamed when asking others for counsel.   

Don’t feel afraid to open yourself up to all possibilities, and learn how to give without expecting anything in return. Before long, you’ll be astonished how quickly your network will blossom.

Give unconditionally, make time to keep in touch and remain receptive to new possibilities. You’ll establish your own flourishing kick-ass network in no time!

 ~†~ Baby Steps Are Key ~†~ Envision interconnection. Find inspiration and balance within yourself through your relationship to the world.

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It’s a secret that most self-made millionaires all ready know. In fact, no successful person ever clawed their way to the top alone. So what is the elusive secret to their abundant success?

Remember, truth is almost always simple. And you may be surprised to learn how simple their secret really is. It’s a concept that can benefit anyone striving to accomplish their passions and dreams.

The Importance of Networking and Giving

As you blaze your own unique path in life, avoid the trap of becoming so wrapped up in yourself and your endeavors that you accidentally overlook the incredible benefits of giving. By becoming disconnected from others, it unknowingly creates a crutch which ultimately may sabotage certain goals. 

• One of the most important keys to success lies in the crucial ability to network with others. Through recognizing the value of every individual who enters your life, your network continually expands and becomes an invaluable tool for building a platform of success.

So how does this work?

As previously mentioned, no one becomes wildly successful on their own. Those who have been catapulted to extreme success in their careers understand the value of networking through giving, and also know how to ask others for help when needed.

Shifting Attitude to Inviting Success

Just as tiny seeds of wealth eventually blossom into financial prosperity, also think of your current network of family and friends as seedlings of potentiality.  

• Everyone we encounter literally has the potential to change our lives. By recognizing this and opening ourselves up to each unique possibility, we thus enrich our existence and gain invaluable allies in the process.

Are you interested in a certain career or industry, but feel baffled on where to begin? Use your network to gather information! Chances are a friend, or a friend of a friend, knows someone involved with a similar career path. It can be as simple as asking for advice or requesting to meet someone involved in that particular industry.

Are you excitedly brimming with an innovative idea, yet feel unsure if you’re on the right track? Pick the brains of your family and friends! Their feedback and suggestions could re-align your concept with precisely what it needs to become launched. Perhaps they even know someone who can help bring your concept to the next level. 

• Establishing a solid network also requires the humbling experience of knowing when and how to reach out when in need.

Nurturing Your Network

In return, wildly successful individuals recognize the value of nurturing their networks through giving. Chances are, if you’ve given unconditionally in the past, those who have touched your life will be eager to help out in any way they can. Even small gestures will be kindly remembered.   

1. Learn how to be responsive to others and give unconditionally.
2. Never feel shy about humbly accessing your network when in need.
3. Recognize how every individual has the potentiality to impact us in some way, not just financially. Everyone can empower your life through providing a useful tidbit of information.  

Don’t be so quick to dismiss the importance of each new encounter. After all, that individual could be holding the key to aid in further unlocking your success. And in a more profound spiritual sense, everyone bares the gift of teaching us more about ourselves.

~†~ Baby Steps Are Key ~†~ 

Look for ways to inspire, motivate and support through your unique personality. The more you give unconditionally to other people and causes, the more these gifts will be returned tenfold

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“If you meet the Buddha on the road, kill him!” (an old Zen saying)

In between tearing my home apart (it somewhat resembles a dignified, civil, living habitat again) and administering placement tests to incoming college students at work, I’ve been struggling to rope in needless spending in order to gain a stronger financial foothold.

However, I’ve been severely bitten by the travel bug again. As any free spirit knows, this sort of itch is notoriously unrelenting.  My former destinations have been scattered throughout Scandinavia and Western and Southern Europe. And now the Orient beckons.

I feel it would be totally rad to backpack through Cambodia and Thailand for a month.

While researching into the costs of such an epic journey, I stumbled across a website that kept me in stitches last night. A must-read for any seasoned backpacker / traveler, I present the nifty Budget Traveller’s Guide to Sleeping in Airports.

(For my American friends, note the two l’s in ‘traveller’ is not a typo. The rest of the English-speaking world spells it that way too).

Oh yes, I’ve slept in an airport

I had my own err…pleasant experience of sleeping in an airport in 2004 while taking a delayed inbound flight from London back into the States. I was lodging with a friend in London whose flatmate instructed me to call a taxi since we needed to drag all of my crap from their flat to the Heathrow Airport.

And being that I had been traveling throughout Europe for over four years, I unfortunately had a ton of (extremely heavy) crap stuff in tow.

Not only did a little black cab sputter up the cobblestone driveway 45 minutes late but we got stuck in a horrendous traffic jam in the middle of downtown London. Sitting in a taxi for nearly two and a half hours is not fun, especially when your flight is scheduled to leave in less than two hours.

The driver at least enjoyed himself as he delightedly kept a keen eye on his ticking meter. He twisted around to face me, whistling.

“Don’t know if you’re going to make that flight there, love.”

“I know,” I hissed through clenched teeth.

By the time I arrived to Heathrow three hours later, I had missed my departing flight home and the best they could do was reschedule me on the next outbound flight to Newark, New Jersey. Once I arrived in Newark, I’d be taking a connecting flight to my hometown.

Or so I thought.

Adventures in Newark

I arrived in Newark somewhat past midnight. Little did I know there would be no more arrivals or departures until 7 in the morning, meaning there was a good six hours to kill before I could get out of there. The gift shops, newsstands, food areas, everything with any semblance to sane civilization was shut down and closed. Not the most comfortable of situations.

If you’ve never experienced a crusty airport like Newark in the dead of night, think barren, dimly lit and spooky as hell. The whole freaking place was deserted.

I picked up my four enormous pieces of luggage, panted and dragged them into a quiet corner and assembled them into a make-shift bed to snuggle on top of. I then sprawled out Vitruvian-man style (a leg on one, an arm on another…)

If any of the homeless stragglers hanging around tried to snatch something, I figured it would jolt me awake in time to attempt a trusty ol’ karate kick on their ass.

Security was nowhere to be found.

My eyes fluttered shut in an innocent attempt at rest. Usually I’m in a coma once asleep, but this night I was on high alert. Every whisper of a noise made my eyes immediately snap open and dart suspiciously around. A few questionable characters lumbered nearby as I mustered my bravest don’t-mess-with-me face.

Two finally approached asking for money. I sat up, feigned ignorance and began spewing aggressive Danish while trying to look as unstable as possible.

Like a lunatic, I sputtered something totally random like, “Du må ikke røre mig der!” (You may not touch me there!) and “Hvor er værtshuset!?” (Where’s the bar!?)

I breathed a sigh of relief as they eventually gave up and slinked away from the crazy girl they couldn’t understand.

I also began to wonder if it might be wisest to drag my entire luggage into a bathroom area and shut myself into a stall. But after examining the cleanliness of the surrounding chairs and carpet, the thought of what condition the bathrooms might reveal made my stomach feel queasy.

At least security didn’t bother me all night.

Oh right, because they weren’t around.

I barely conquered an ounce of sleep so it wasn’t a problem ’waking up’ to scurry onto the first departing flight back home. Though I’ll definitely have to remember this wake-up trick for a solo traveler:

If you are travelling solo, write a “Wake me at 5:00 AM” note and stick a few on and around you — it works.  People will wake you.

My situation was slightly creepy but nothing compared to the harrowing experience of a young globe-trotter who, while passing through the South Pacific, witnessed seven people die during a gang shootout in Port Moresby, Papua New Guinea. Port Moresby rightfully earned 2005′s Poopie Airport Award.

Other Strange Places to Sleep for Aspiring Globe-trotters

Contributors to the site have also helped me discover other bizarre but fabulously convenient slumbering options for an adventuring broke-ass to obtain her much-needed beauty rest, such as;

• Bathrooms of 5 star hotels (just pull up a sleeping bag!)
• Restaurants
• Instant photo booths (one of my favorites – curl up, close the curtain and voilà!)
• Even a New York sewer grate can keep you toasty in a pinch!

As Scott Gordon contributes;

Editor’s note: here’s something for the “I don’t think any of us are that cheap” category – “If you’re young, adventurous, and visiting New York, any steamy sewer grate will keep you warm during the colder months, though it’ll dampen your clothing and potentially freeze you the next day.”

Ahem. Just so you know.

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Curious who won top Poopie Honours for last year?

2006 2008 Best and Worst Airport Awards

The Danish Road Safety Council has found an innovative new way to draw attention to speed signs and speed limits in Denmark. According to the campaign, “Despite a decrease in speed violations, 7 out of 10 Danes still exceed the speed limit on a regular basis. Respecting the speed limits is the simplest way to save lives.”

If nudity doesn’t offend you, view a clip of the campaign here.

I lived in Denmark for over four years and consider it my adopted second country. I’ve never visited a more charming, hyggelig (or cosy) destination in all my travels, and I was continually impressed by the natural and environmentally-conscious way of life there. Denmark is filled with extremely kind-hearted folk who are so positive and full of life. They are always pushing boundaries  -  all in good fun.

Oh, those silly Danes!

It took me a moment to figure out what the cab driver was saying. “Denmark has totally redeemed itself!”

hehe, det er for fedt…

With all these Scandinavian bossoms keeping abreast of current issues, is it any wonder a study from last year showed Danes as being the happiest people on earth? Or that today it was found to have the most dynamic economy in the EU, according to the World Economic Forum?

So when do we get some blonde nordic studs?

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Baby  Step #5 – Simple techniques can go a long way in improving overall happiness. It doesn’t have to feel overwhelming.

Recent research is challenging the notion that attaining happiness is a futile pursuit.  In fact, some relatively simple steps have resulted in excellent long-term results and decreased depressive qualities. Here’s a quick  snippet;

"Happiness is the process, not the place," [Deiner] said via e-mail. "So many of us think that when we get everything just right, and obtain certain goals and circumstances, everything will be in place and we will be happy…. But once we get everything in place, we still need new goals and activities…"

So what does it take? Here are some simple techniques to lead a happier life. You might be surprised.

~†~ Baby Steps are Key ~†~

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